The President Responds to the World Cup Finale for Team USA

The White House
Washington, DC

Good Afternoon (Look sad and concerned. Scratch face)

Earlier my administration watched the United States end its hope (and change!) for a World Cup victory. As you know, my administration has been active in the promotion of soccer since day one. I believe that by spreading the sports wealth around, all of American sports will prosper. Some will have you believe that America's best sports days are behind us. But I will not give in to the notion that sports are destined to fail.

I inherited an enormous debt of soccer talent. The previous administration, pursuing a course of sports abandonment that only benefited the rich sports, through a series of deregulation, allowed soccer to become subpar, sub standard and inadequate. This is unacceptable. But now is not the time to look backward at the mistakes previous administration made. Now is the time to look ahead.

We must act now. We must act swiftly and with determination. The time for talking is over. Now is the time to act. I am not one to believe that it is impossible to improve America's sports talent. I will not give in to the notion that America's sport's future is grim. Today I am announcing a Soccer Czar. This person, appointed by me, will serve my administration by ensuring that proper and adequate soccer attention is provided in sports television, sports radio and sports newscasting. With this new focused attention on the matter, my Soccer Czar will inform my administration about steps I can take that will address this challenge.

Now is the time to act. Now is the time to come together as Americans and say, yes we can. We can kick the ball and not use our hands. Let us use our heads and direct the momentum in our favor. We can score that soccer goal. Now is the time and this is the moment when my administration headed by me will make sports history for all Americans.

Thank you.

Thank you for closing 395, Barry

Early on in the administration of our "clean and articulate" President, the page sixers of journalism wrote with orgasmic joy of his coolness, his love of food and his desire to be out and about. Remember the "date night" which shut down part of the West Side highway so he and Michelle could see Raisin in the Sun?

Well, that's continued. The Obama's like to go out. And it's annoying.

Bush was a dullard who liked to spend time on his ranch. He also entertained in Crawford (or Camp David) and held many meetings there- away from the press, the limelight and the inconvenience it would cause the average Joe.

Not Barry.

Some months ago he held that nuclear summit which did as much to reduce nuclear proliferation as what I am about to do: NO MORE NUCS. And now- SHAZAAM! PRESTO CHANGE-O! Done, right? It worked? No? Crap. Well- the intention was to reduce nuclear threats... and when you are a lefty, intention is ALL that matters... but I'm getting off point... my point is that Obama held said nuclear magic show in the DC Convention center- right smack in the middle of the city- and shut down blocks and blocks of city streets, creating a traffic nightmare and causing those who live around that area to live in a version of the Warsaw Ghetto.

Bush would have held it at Crawford. But past Presidents cared about the results. Obama only cares about the show. After all- that's all he's got. That's how he ran his campaign and won: show. Appearances. Perception. Impression. Illusion...

So Russian Czar Medvedev comes to DC and after Obama bows before him (I'm sure he did...) he went to a burger joint in Arlington. And to get there, Secret Service shut down I-395 for hours.

Thanks.

Thanks for causing untold numbers of people headed to Dulles and Reagan to miss flights. Thanks for causing thousands of us to be stuck in traffic, engines idling with AC blaring in 95 degree temperatures (so much for global warming theory, eh Barry??). Thanks for backing up 14th Street, 4th Street, South Capitol Street, I-295, Pennsylvania Avenue, SE, Rt. 50, the GW Parkway, the Beltway...

But hey - you LOOKED really cool. "Hey I may be President but I know a great little burger joint if you want to grab lunch". Funny how he only had 20 minutes for the CEO of BP (how's that leak going?) but he had time to take an impromptu trip to grab a burger with the premiere of the Soviet Union.

Substance doesn't matter. It's all about impressions. It's about telling the muslims in Cairo how bad America has been and how great islam is. It's about telling ex-pats and Germans how bad Bush is and how great he will be as President. It's about telling Americans how wrong they are on race and how he remains uncontaminated of Rev. Wright's hatred. The purpose is not to win, but to tie. To make all things equal. To "spread the wealth around" as he told Joe the Plumber. To ensure fairness.

I bet Obama loves Soccer.

Hype and Hope

Did Barack Obama really say he is looking for an ass to kick?

Really?

The President of the United States... spoke like a Tony Soprano. If Tony Soprano had a son with Urkle.

The time for looking for an ass to kick, Mr. Hopey Changey, was 50 days ago when this happened. You know, before your two vacations, your White House concerts, a few rounds of golf and some graduations speeches. Maybe instead of retaliation and "keeping your boot on their neck" you could SOLVE the problem.

Funny- all talk and no action. This is the guy, as Sarah Palin reminded us at the GOP convention almost 2 years ago, who authored two memoirs and not one piece of legislation. This from the guy who used his own campaign as an example of executive experience.

Now we see what a lack of experience means. President Obama is not making decisions because he is both incapable and incompetent. There is no one to turn to, no one to correct his mistake, no media to hide the millions of gallons of oil, no Tony rezko to funnel his money, no guilty white Harvard or Columbia University professor to grade him on a curve.

Steven Strasburg is making his debut right now and for those of us who couldn't get tickets (or wouldn't spend the money) for this debut are stuck watching it on MASN2 which is not in HD (what century is this?). Three great innings. Six strike outs with a change-up averaging 90mph. Now in the top of the 4th, this young phenom gave up back to back hits and it's first and second with no outs. Hang on... now after a double play, a two run hommer.

Will Strasburg be hype or hope for the Nats? We are excited, turned out in record numbers to watch his inauguration into the Majors. What's he going to do? Yes, baseball is a team sport. Pitching is not (as much). What's he going to do? Will he blame the stadium, the fans, the team, the previous pitcher, the manager, the umpire? Will he bluster and blather in the locker room and pontificate on his greatness and ability without delivering the goods?

Barack Obama was a lot of hope. In the last 17 months he's proven to be nothing more than hype. Words, tomes and volumes of words, thesauraus and dictionary, erudite and eloquent words.

So no one should be afraid of an Obama ass kicking. It's just words. Again.

It's Official: Anti-semitism is OK in the Obama White House

Helen Thomas' disgusting departure from her career as front-and-center member of the White House Press Corp illustrates a certain tolerance of anti-semitism. Don't get me wrong- I'm glad to see her go. Her vile and angry banter has been tolerated for too long. But I'm surprised she was allowed to resign.



Rand Paul's comments (what did he even say?) was front page fodder for feign indignation and a catalyst for more "tea bagging" jokes by the left. Despite the fact that the NYTimes blatantly lied (OK- creatively edited) about his comments, Rand Paul is still demonized by the media.

And let's not even talk about Don Imus. Too bad Helen didn't call the Jews nappy-headed. Maybe then she would have to apologize to... someone.

Had a comment been made about Hispanics or Blacks or Gays or muslims, Helen Thomas would have been immediately fired by the White House Press Corp, forbidden access to compound and probably shunned. Instead, CNN today talked about her as a pioneer of women journalists and a praised her tenacity and courage.

It's so courageous to be on the far left. I'm often amazed at Michael Moore's gut. Errr guts.

So I'm glad to see Helen go. Took too many a year for this to happen. But I'm sad that Jew-hating is somehow acceptable in Barack Hussein Obama's White House. I'm sad that he didn't come out against Helen's hatred and ask her to step aside. I'm side they let her resign on her own terms, as if she merrited compassion after advocating ethnic clenseing.

Yes, I'm sad. But not surprised.

Humanitarian Aid with knives guns and clubs

In the earliest stages of this Administration, Obama made it clear that Islam would be treated with kid gloves. He delivered a speech in Cairo lauding Islam for accomplishments they never achieved in mathematics and architecture. He praised Islam for its contributions to mankind and apologized for the west's treatment.

Terrorism became "man made disasters" and war became "overseas contingency operations". And he waited for them to love him.

But they didn't. In fact, the Taliban upped the ante and increased their aggression. Huh? Disasters were made by men in Fort Hood, on Christmas Day and in Times Square. What?

This was all supposed to cease. Radical Islam was supposed to like us now. And rainbows and ponies would fill the earth...

Israel has been left alone. And I didn't think I could cheer for a foreign country over my own, but twice now Benjamin Netanyahu has declined invitations to the White House after being royally snubbed in his first visit, and I find myself saying GO BEN!

Seven million Israelis, surrounded by 350 million muslims, are defending their land and their lives. What is this "humanitarian" boat of goods steered by "activists"? And why is it? Why is it needed? What has happened in Gaza that suddenly an entire barge of "aid" is needed? Was there an earthquake? Did the muslim world send a barge to Haiti or Peru? I didn't notice...

Good for Israel- stopping this boat of weapons and arms from Hammas for Hammas. And while the tolerant left gasps at such brazen self defense, Israel is safe. Maybe if we took such bold steps in our airports and in our general homeland security, we would be safe, too.

Instead grandma is shuffling barefoot through the terminal holding her belt and ticket to see the grandkids in Santa Fe while TSA agents scream at her for touching the conveyor belt.